Wisdom of Dis-ease 10: Message of Illness 疾病的智慧: 系列 10 – 疾病的启示

In my clinical practice, I also learn a lot from my patients. They could tell me stories of their real-life experiences.

A mother told me that once her 3-4 year-old girl had a bout of fever. The moment she told her that she needn’t go to school, the daughter immediately recovered from the fever. No medication was needed.

A young lady in her 20s was having asthma. We discussed about the emotional implications of illness. She told that since young, whenever her parents were about to start a fight, she immediately “heew…heew…heew…” The argument stopped immediately and all attention diverted to her.

Another lady in her late thirties had giddiness for 3 months. One of the few things she uttered, “Since I am sick, my daughter is now helping to do the house work.”

From the 3 examples here, I draw the conclusion that there is an element of manipulation through illness in order to achieve what they want.

The little girl refused to go to school. In order to avoid nursery, the only way is to get sick. This is a silent protest. The asthmatic girl managed to avert the parents’ quarrel by having asthmatic attack. For the lady with giddiness, there was no way to get her teen daughter to help out in her housework. The only way is to get sick which demanded that she lie in bed. On seeing that her mother was sick, the daughter then agreed to help out, without being asked.

Day in day out, there are many such cases in my clinical practice. Underneath every sickness, there is a high possibility of manipulation which we need to address. Otherwise, illness may prolong or another illness may manifest, to the suffering of the patient and the family.

从我多年的临床经验，我的病患经常教导我人生的智慧。他们经常向我叙述真人真事的体验。

一位妈妈告诉我说，有一次她的3-4岁的女儿发高烧，当她告诉女儿不必上学时，女儿的烧马上不药而愈！

一位20多岁的少女，因哮喘而来看诊。我们研究情绪与疾病的课题。她说，小时候当父母正要起冲突时，她马上“heew…heew…heew…”。当然，争吵马上停止，全部的专注转移到她的病上！

另一位30多岁的妇女，头晕了3个月。看诊当下，她无意中说，“我生病之后，我的女儿就会帮忙家务。”

这三个个案让我有个结论，那就是，为了达到某个目的，有些病人用病来操纵家人。

小女孩拒绝上学，唯一的方法就是“造出”病来，这是无言的抗议。那哮喘的少女，用她的哮喘来转移父母的纠纷。少妇的头晕则是用来操纵女儿，因为叫不动，只好用“妙计”来指使女儿帮她做繁重的家务。

这些例子，在我临床经验，比比皆是。病症的底端，操纵的可能性很高，我们务必需要关注这方面，要不然病症可能缠身，没完没了，再严重则可能病会加重或转移，麻烦了病患及家人。

万物一切为心造 烦恼只有自己找 自寻烦恼不知道 疾病很快就来到!